A bit scattered (and depressing) update

 Hi everyone, just wanted to pop in with a quick update. Things got incredibly beserck in end of August-beginning of October. Truthfully, they got a little crazy before, but it all worsened then. School became busier, and there started to be rumors that there were going to be changes at work that would impact me greatly, as well as everyone else. 

  Long story short, we found out that my grandparents had been in the hospital for approximately 3-5 days (Grandma B. went first, then Grandpa followed) for Covid. They remained hospitalized for a few weeks before Grandpa went on comfort care, ironically the week after I learned about it in class. Grandpa passed shortly thereafter; Grandma went comfort care the day fter Grandpa's funeral (Monday) and died the same day. I wish I could say that the hospital they were at took great care of them, and did their best to keep them comfortable in their last days, but sadly I cannot. The family had to pitch fits just to get them pain medication once in a while; normally, with comfort care, the goal is to keep them as painfree and peaceful as possible, but not at this hospital. There were a couple of great nurses that did attempt to do so, but sadly that was the minority, not the overall experience. I might write more about that later; I'm not really sure at this point. 

  Thankfully, my boss was amazing with all of this, as were my classmates and instructor. All three made a point to check on me frequently, and are probably the only reason I did not end up on a 96 hour hold. I was suppose to have a exam over comfort care and cancer the day after Grandma passed, but thankfully my instructor allowed me to push it off until the next Monday. I got a little misty-eyed taking it then, there was no way I was going to make it through it that Wednesday without crying, so I am incredibly thankful for that. 

  The day we first went to their house after they had both passed was a hard one. Family had came in from out of state, and an uncle occasionally lived them, so it did not look like their house. That combined with them not being there hit me hard. Thankfully, the bathroom was open, so I hid in there to a take a moment; I only say this to say that a classmate, a fellow stitcher, had the misfortune of texting me at that time and got stuck having to talk me out of the bathroom, via text. The poor guy was so sweet to do so!

  Unfortunately, that same day, on the way home I found out that I will need to have a second job by the end of December. The board decided to switch the full timers to a 48-96 shift (not safe), and make the 12 hour truck a full time truck (probably needed long before now). While the 12 hour becoming a fully-staffed truck that will run 24/7 is best for the district, it means that all of the PRNers, including myself, will likely not have many, or any, hours once it is staffed with full time personnel. My boss very sweetly did not want to tell me this until after my Grandma's funeral, but a coworker told me when I asked what the meeting they wanted all staff to go (never a good thing) to was about. I also found out that she was going through her own rough time; the board decided that they would not be renewing her contract (we basically rent her from a large hospital/ambulance service in the vicinity). There are a lot of unknowns, and she is required to train her temporary replacement through the end of the year, which I feel is insult to injury, but she is doing amazing with her attitude about it. Fortunately, the way her contract was set up, she still has a job at the company she is from. 

  Things are going a lot better now. I'm still dealing with all of the normal emotions of grief. My Mom is having the hardest time; losing both parents so fast is something I cannot even try to imagine. She appears to be doing a little better now, but prayers for her would be appreciated.

  On a more positive note, while my grades have slipped some, I am not in immediate danger of failing out of nursing school! We have to keep our grades at a 74 or 76%; I forget which. While a bad test score could drop my grade dramatically, it tentatively looks like I just might be in the portion moving on! 

  Sorry this was not a more uplifting update. I had to be up at 3 to come in early for a coworker, so I'm not in a sunshiney mood just yet. I'll try to post something happier soon. To be honest, I knew this would be a harder post to write, which is why I have not updated in a long time. I hope that all of you and your loved ones are doing amazing; please, tell me what you have been up to!

  Happy Stitching,

  Emmy