I hope all of youns are having a great day, and enjoying my favorite season of the year!
Happy Stitching!
Emmy
Am I the only one that is incredibly slow at decorating this year? I've been working on putting up Christmas decorations for what feels like weeks now! I had planned to decorate before Thanksgiving (I did not get to put out any Thanksgiving/fall decor, so why not?), but life got in the way. It doesn't help that my energy levels are staying lower than usual. Well, I'm not entirely certain that they are lower than usual, but I am not able to ignore the lack of energy and power through lately. I should probably listen to whatever my body is trying to tell me... nah, too big a hassle.
I also really, really, really want to stitch Christmas things now, but I have a huge WIP pile, and do not want to add Singing in the Rain to it. Plus, I think I could finish this one soon, if the time and opportunity present themselves.
Is anyone else planning on leaving Christmas decorations up later than usual this year? I figure by the time I finish getting them up, I should leave them up late to actually have more than a day to enjoy them!
Also, is anyone else running behind on Christmas shopping? I am usually done by now. My Christmas shopping starts the day after Christmas, most years, and that did happen. But, I always have more that I need to shop for, and that has not been entirely done yet. And I don't have anything for the white elephant thing my work shift is doing on Christmas Eve. Usually, I'm more creative about what to get, but last year and this year I have been somewhat indifferent to it. Oh well, I'll think of something.
Chocolate, and random other foods, are tasting weird to me. Not sure why, I'm not sick, and my sinus issues are not really that much worse than usual. It is incredibly sad though. I keep forgetting and getting hot chocolate, or taking a bite of something chocolatey, then the weird bitter taste hits and I get all sad. Or mad. Mostly sad-mad.
be a cat disguised as a human. Reasons why I think this:
I do have stitching to report from last shift:
I have also been slowly decorating for Christmas, with the help of Santa Paws, pictured above. It has been an excruciating slow process. What is done is pretty though. Except a few areas, but I'm just king of like "Eh, it'll do." The one time of the year when I let myself go all out in the tacky and overboard department, and I'm not feeling very much of either this year.
In other news, I am applying to SBU's paramedic to RN bridge program. Mom went with me to visit with the director of admissions, and he was most helpful. Their sim lab is incredible. I felt like I walked into a hospital and forgot the patient I was bringing at work. So far, all is going well with the application process. As long as my college transcript arrives speedily, and I take the A&P refresher (somehow my A&P 1 "expired;" makes no sense, but whatever), I should be accepted to start this summer. He sees no reason why I would not get one of the spots, so that is very reassuring.
I hope you all have a great night. I need to try to get some sleep now. The other truck just got a call.
G'Night, and I hope you dream of sugar plum fairies and stitching bliss!
~Emmy
Why? If I was a size 2, I would not be strong. The only way my body type could fit in those jeans would be for me to lose both my fluff and a lot of my muscle mass. And that would not be worth it. I like being able to pull myself up oddball places on my ambulance to reach things, because this body of mine is not tall by any stretch of the imagination. I like being able to surprise people with how much I can lift (although, I cannot lift it high. And that is ok.). I like being able to have curves instead of a plain shape. Not that there is anything wrong that!!! It just wouldn't be me! I use to work out dreaming of being the cucumber. Now I work out because this avocado is strong, and she would like to become stronger. And even if I was not strong, I still matter because of who I am. No, I am not perfect. I am a dork, clumsy, awkward, and frequently feel like I am in over my head. And there is nothing wrong with that. Not knowing what to say does not mean I am not smart- it just means I am a human. Crying doesn't make me weak- it means that I care about others, and I feel their pain with them. My all-natural clumsiness and awkwardness often gets my coworkers and family to smile, or even laugh, when they are having a blah or rough day. Who I am as an avocado is pretty great, even though I may not necessarily believe it. Even when I have to loosen to my belt (it must have turned into an anaconda since yesterday!), forget how to English, and feel insecure about my body type and where I am in life, I still matter and can make a difference. I care more about my waistline than anyone else does. Others are not going to notice that I loosened my belt by one hole. Me tripping over my words, or even forgetting my only language, can create inside jokes with my family. And there is not better feeling than someone understanding exactly what I am trying to say, especially when it was pure gibberish. That is how you feel understood, people! Others look at my accomplishments differently from me. To me, my accomplishments are not that impressive, but other people's are. And others can look at my failures without cringing like I do- instead they see how I got back up, dusted myself off, and stubbornly (occasionally foolishly) proceeded to try another 345,345 times.
Besides, who wants to be a cucumber anyway? They can be bitter at times, and have those weird pokey things if allowed to stay in the garden too long. This avocado is pretty even when she feels ugly. She is healthy, and learning how to become even healthier. She is learning to focus on growing as a person and cutting herself the same slack she gives to others. She doesn't think anything negative of the other avocados (or even the cucumbers)- instead she looks at them and thinks they are beautiful. So, she is learning to view herself with the same lens. Which is weird, and awkward, and a work in progress. But, it is so worth the work and hassle. All she needs to do is focus on what she is, instead of what she is not. And see the beauty of being an avocado when the world screams that being a cucumber is where it is at. There is beauty, bravery, and strength in being who you are when the world tells you that there is no place for you, that you don't fit in, and that you will never be enough.
Speaking from experience, fitting in is overrated. Honestly, it is rather miserable. And to fit in with a lot of groups, you have to lose your good qualities. You can't show how smart you are because that might make someone feel dumb. And heaven help you if you try to teach them how to do something they don't know how to do. Not having a place can be rough, but my place is not here- one day I get to go home, and I will have a place at my Father's table then. Not being enough is kind of the point- if any one of us was enough, we would have no need for each other, or even God. There is a huge blessing in not being enough.
So, my little avocado friends: love yourself for who and what you are, inside and out. The outside does not matter as much as we tend to tell ourselves, and you are beautiful just as you are right now. And remember, you and I are both just works of art in progress. If God was done with us, we would be dead by now. We don't get to be finished on this side of heaven, and that is good and well. We get to grow, learn, and live. We are humans, made in God's image. We get to touch the lives of people we don't even know each and every day, and make a positive difference in their life without ever knowing it. All just by being who we are, who God created us to be. And that is incredibly beautiful.
